July 14, 2017

What Should I Do During Active No Contact [and Get My Ex Back]

Video Summary

In this video Clay Andrews, a relationship coach talks about how to spend the time during the Active No Contact period.

At Relationship Inner Game, we teach that you should spend 30 days following a break-up in getting to know yourself and to do some internal re-organization. There are exercises to help you understand and manage the Three Mindset Pillars which dictate the way in which you handle life in general. The program gives you the necessary tools to move forward in a healthier way.

Three Mindset Pillars

The Three Pillars; awareness, acceptance, and commitment, work to help you handle life’s challenges in a healthy way. When, for example, you broke up with your ex, you probably went through a series of emotions including anger, denial, and more anger. What you needed to be aware of was the reality of the breakup. You needed to accept the fact that you felt unhappy and un-fulfilled, and finally you needed to realize that no matter how enlightened you are, you can only be responsible for your own happiness and well-being. Knowing that you are only responsible for yourself is a very liberating and stress-reducing revelation.

The Active No Contact period

For our program, we suggest that you not contact or seek to interact with your ex for at least 30 days while you explore your own emotional health. Because you are in pain at first and probably out of control of your emotions to some degree, we discourage any contact with your ex. The way you’re feeling you’ll only make things worse. Instead, during this time, we expect that you will do the exercises and learn the lessons we provide. This will help you with the immediate pain and loneliness associated with the break-up. What you do with the rest of your time is something that you will need to determine for yourself.

Make it easy on yourself

Spend some time thinking about what you think will serve to soothe and comfort you. Some folks take up a new and challenging hobby like painting. Others read. Some re-decorate. The one thing we discourage completely is spending this time obsessing about or stressing over y our ex.

In order to get well and start a new relationship with your ex or an entirely new partner, you want to be come a more complete person with more realistic expectations of what you can and cannot do to make your life fuller.

About Clay Andrews

Clay Andrews is a dating and relationship coach who helps women find the right type of man they can create a loving and thriving relationship with. He is the creator of Ex Solution Program- a program that helps couples get back together. To know more about Clay, visit his website below.

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