Can You Get Your Ex Back After Months or Years Apart? (7 Powerful Tips To Recreate Attraction and Bring Your Ex Back)
Most relationships can be salvaged, even months or years after a bad breakup.
Not all relationships can be salvaged but most can. Some of the benefits you can enjoy after the months or years being apart is that you have had time to get past any hurt your ex may have caused you. Having no hurt can lead to no anger, and resentment. Erasing some of the negative memories is crucial is getting your ex back, and time has a way of doing just that; making sure your ex retains positive memories of your time together. This is especially true if the relationship ended on bad terms, such as fighting or cheating. The longer time has lapsed the better your chances that all the negative memories have subsided.
In the event that not all negative memories are erased, it will remove at a minimum some of those memories.
Hopefully, in your situation the time that has lapsed since the original break up has removed the worst of the memories. Another good factor of the time you spent apart, is that you both may have dated other people. While this may sound ridiculous in terms of getting your ex back, it can actually be helpful in regards that it may help you appreciate what time you had with your ex. Chances are you and your ex have missed each other, and have realized you want to be together. The time you spent apart from each other may have given you a new perspective and time to grow emotionally. This is the good news about being apart with your ex.
Now for the bad news.
Time can also be your enemy when it comes to getting your ex back, depending upon how much time has actually lapsed. Perhaps he has found someone new, and won’t respond to your attempts of getting him back. You should be prepared for the possibility that things may never work out between the two of you, no matter how hard you may try.
Reestablishing contact with your ex after months or years have passed, will widely depend upon which of you initiated the breakup, what caused the breakup, and when the break up occurred.
This may make things a bit more challenging, so prepare yourself of that possibility. If he broke up with you making contact may be the easiest way to reconnect. Just texting or calling him out of the blue shouldn’t arouse any suspicions that you are wanting him back. If you do decide to call or text your ex after a lengthy period, make sure you have a legitimate reason for making the contact.
Something simple like, “Hey, haven’t talked to you in a while, and wanted to see how you are doing?” In this particular scenario, texting or emailing is not recommended. Ideally it is best to arrange an “Accidental” run in. However you go about it whether it be face to face, social networking or texting, you need to relay feelings of familiarity again, and it is much more difficult to do electronically. It is much better to relay that familiarity in a face to face meeting.
You want to show your ex the new you, so he can see how much you have changed for the better, during the months or years you have been apart. He needs to see you are thriving and happy with your life and that things are going great for you, and have been since the breakup.
When you finally do meet up with your ex, there are a few things to keep in mind.
First, try not to be nervous, because if you are nervous he may also get nervous making the meeting awkward. Stay as calm, cool & collected as possible.
Second, always try and keep the conversation light and as casual and upbeat as possible. This is to remind your ex why he loved you back in the day and that means he needs to see the lighter, more fun person you have become since the breakup.
Third, flirt with him. Flirting is a good thing, especially if you are both having a good time. Laugh a lot, caress his arm, make frequent eye contact, just be extremely flirtatious with him.
Fourth, bring up some of your best memories with him. Doing so will bring up the happier memories and make him think back on them. If the meeting is going very well, and you feel comfortable, you can even remind him of some of your best memories in the bedroom.
Fifth, with the exception of the happier memories, leave the past where it belongs, in the past. Don’t bring up anything negative. No old problems should be discussed. Doing so may make him remember the negative moments, rather than the positive moments.
Sixth, you should give your ex the impression that your life has been great since the breakup. Don’t be afraid to casually talk about some of the people you may have dated since the breakup, without going into excessive details. Instead of depending on words to give your ex an impression on how much you have changed for the best, use actions. Show him you are much more matured than you were in the past. This may get him, even if it is subconsciously, about being with you again.
Seventh: SEX. As strange as that sounds, let him know you are sexually available. Your first goal of the meeting is to get him to thinking about you again and then set the stage for physical romance. Sex is what differentiates being “just friends” or being in a relationship.
Your ultimate goal, rather it be after the initial meeting or further down the road, is to recreate a sexual relationship and to win back your ex.
About Brad Browning
Brad Browning is a relationship coach and breakup expert from Vancouver, Canada. For the past decade, Brad has worked with thousands of men and women around the world, helping to reverse breakups and mend broken relationships.
Brad is author of the best-selling Ex Factor Guide program, which teaches readers how to get their ex back. He also offers personal coaching to a limited number of clients, guiding them through the process of winning back an ex or recovering from a difficult breakup.