How To Be The Girl He Wants To Date vs The One He Just Wants To Have Sex With

Video Summary

Amy North is a dating and relationship coach who authors coachnorth.com, which provides relationship guide to women.  In this video, she helps you to distinguish between being the women a man wants to date as opposed to being the woman he just wants to have sex with.  Knowing the difference is the key to having a relationship with the guy of your dreams.

What do you have to offer him?

Most single men would be willing to have sex with any woman they find attractive.  Other than the thought that he can score with her, not much else goes into the decision to sleep with someone.  And sometimes, that’s all that a man is looking for. 

His thought process will be far more complex in choosing the woman he will date.  After all, this will be the woman he will want to show off to his family and friends.  So more often than not,  the woman he sleeps with casually will not likely be the woman he will date and have a relationship with.  And to be the girl he wants to date, you need to show him what you have to offer him in a relationship.   

Show him what he’s missing

To be the woman he wants to date, you need to make him realize that life with you is better than life without you.  There’s a tricky balance involved.  You need to give him enough taste of dating you but not too much so that he keeps wanting more.

When you give him too much of yourself without having him commit to you first will make him feel that there’s really no need to commit.  Sex, for instance.  If he can get that from you and still keep his single lifestyle, then why wouldn't he?

 Play a little hard to get

Men are hunters at heart and they love to play the chasing game.  They are hardwired for it.  Give him a chance to pursue you and you are actually feeding his most basic desires.  When he has to win you over, you will be more valuable to him. 

This is also why he won’t date the woman he sleeps with on the same night they met at the bar.  Too easy; so to him, she has no value.  The short-lived chase will not be enough to keep him interested. 

Keep the chase alive

To keep him hooked, let him be the instigator in your dynamic. Let him take the reins – for the most part, at least. And when he does come calling, don’t be too available. Get him to think what a full, exciting life you have. Make him work for your time and attention, which will make you that much more of a prize to be won.