“Better to put your heart on the line, risk everything, and walk away with nothing than play it safe. Love is a lot of things, but “safe” isn’t one of them.”
~ Mandy Hale
As Mahatma Gandhi stated, “You must be the change to want to see in the world”.
If we desire a certain outcome in our lives, we must be ready to take the lead on this ourselves.
Women oftentimes become influenced by gender role stereotypes, not even realizing the expectations they are placing on their partners.
The more women take the lead by making choices they wish to see, the more they will be happy in the relationship. Men also appreciate women who have conviction, know what they want, and can execute a plan to reach those goals.
If there’s a restaurant you want to go to, make a reservation and invite him.
If there’s a movie, museum, event, concert, or play you’d like to go to, book two tickets and invite your partner along.
By becoming a leader in your own life and not waiting for your partner, this not only bring you joy, but it will organically create a change within your partner.
By you taking the initial lead in the relationship, it will motivate him to do the same for you.
While you both have a quiet moment to talk, directly share how you would feel if he took the lead in the relationship. Then, follow up by providing specific ways he could take more initiative.
Men respond to clear and direct forms of communication. Give your partner notice and let him know you would like to talk about whatever topic is on your mind.
Men respond well to timeframes, deadlines, and naming your why.
Timeframes and deadlines help provide structure within the relationship.
Naming your why is helpful for your partner to have an understanding why it is your wanting him to take the lead in certain areas within the relationship.
By your partner taking the lead in the relationship, do you then feel more loved, safer, more connected to him, validated, or understood?
Once you get clear on why you want him to take the lead in certain areas of the relationship, share how it makes you feel when he does so.
Healthy relationships are built on shared decision making and both people taking the lead in certain areas.