Q. Great point especially when you mention "In order to attract the life of our dreams, we must deem ourselves worthy of such." I think it also applies to love "In order to attract a high quality man of your dreams, you must believe you are worthy of attracting such a man."
Can you offer some insights on some practical, insightful changes women can make in their life that can make a positive difference to their love lives whether it's attracting the right kind of men or creating a relationship devoid of drama and anxiety or being comfortable openly and honestly discussing issues in a relationship without having the fear of losing the man?
A. Attracting the right type of man isn’t as difficult as it’s made out to be.
Simply put, the problem isn’t who we are attracting; it is who we are when we are attracting him.
It is quantum law that energy attracts like energy; hence, if we do not value ourselves (energy), we will continue to attract men who do not value us (like energy).
I do not value me = man who does not value me
We cannot expect a different type of man to show up in our lives if we are resonating at the same vibrational level we always have.
Furthermore, if we choose to keep dating a man when it’s become clear he doesn’t value us, we are telling the Universe this is all I am worthy of. Uni will not bring us something different if we do not deeply believe we are worthy of it, because the Universe will not impose on our free-will.
So in order to attract a different type of man, we must become a different type of woman.
We do this by altering our conditioned patterns of thinking and behaving which in turn shifts our energy from unworthy to worthy!
Here’s how it goes:
5 Ultimate Energy Shifters
1. Know yourself
When we take the time to dig deep into our likes, dislikes, values and goals, we are honoring all that we authentically are. In addition, we put ourselves in the optimal position to demonstrate and communicate our values to a partner. When we know ourselves well, we naturally begin to act from a place that supports and maintains that.
2. Love yourself
When we do not love ourselves, we will not notice others’ non-loving behavior because it will be congruent to how we already treat ourselves.
Their behavior will not stand out as unacceptable until we experience the opposite - true self-love. When you love yourself, others’ disrespectful treatment will hit you like a 2 x 4! No longer will you be confused by others’ bad behavior because self-love makes right from wrong undeniably clear.
3. Forgive yourself and others
Forgiveness is one of the greatest miracles we can experience here on Earth! Forgiveness has the capacity to energetically reach out and alter our present and future experiences. Forgiveness literally dissipates the invisible, dense energy that has shrouded and clouded our energetic field.
Work to release the toxic bond of condemnation and anger by offering forgiveness to yourself and others. Forgiveness often comes in layers so be sure to give yourself grace along the way.
4. Speak well of yourself
Often we like to downplay our gifts and strengths because we think it is more attractive to minimize ourselves. The ultimate energy shift does not happen by acting haughty and arrogant, but by humbly recognizing and owning all the creative and powerful elements of ourselves.
Speaking well of ourselves informs others (and Uni) we value who we are. It resonates out as confidence which is one of the most attractive characteristics we can possess!
Be willing to receive compliments graciously and more importantly, speak kindly & highly about yourself every, single day.
5. Learn to pass
If it is not in your highest interest or in alignment with your morals and values, take a pass! Saying Yes to situations that clearly are not good for us is telling the world our soul is compromisable. Yikes!
Living our value means never compromising our sacred self for anyone. Ever.
No matter how lonely you might be feeling, saying Yes to something that is not good for you in order to fill the void momentarily, is taking three giant steps backward. Learn to take a pass and not feel guilty about it. Take care of and protect your sacred self at all times.
Sisters, I was the woman who repeatedly attracted non-reciprocal relationships. I’ve had my share of physical & verbal abuse, disrespect, addictions, lies, infidelity and non-committers. Until one day, I decided I had had enough.
I finally realized I was the common denominator in these dramatic relationships and Iwould continue to attract the same type of men if I did not “fix” what was going on inside of me. I set course to heal my worth and guess what happened?
I finally broke the pattern of my non-reciprocal relationships because I changed the way I thought about, perceived and treated myself.
Sisters, the words in the article are not fluff. They are truth and if diligently applied to your life, will indeed bring you closer to experiencing the relationship of your dreams.
I believe in you!
About Kristen Brown
Kristen Brown is an Relationship Healing and Self-Worth Recovery life coach, Author and Speaker. Her deep desire to help others reach their full potential blossomed in adolescence and later became her life’s work after she experienced a profound betrayal that catalyzed a major internal transformation of her self-worth.
Kristen Brown’s neutrality and non-judgment can be felt by anyone who has ever shared space with her. She has been called the “real deal” by many of her clients as she is unabashedly open about her experiences, follies, mistakes and history.
Kristen Brown was raised in Scottsdale, Arizona where she continues to reside with her three beautiful children and her amazing life mate she calls “the gift and result of my healing”.
To work with Kristen is to feel seen, heard and understood like you never have been before! She is a spiritual cheerleader! Visit www.sweetempowerment.com to know more.