Many people struggle with being ignored by their ex after a breakup and they want to know why this is happening. What happens and why does your ex put up a wall after having been in close relationship for all that time?
Your ex is looking for space
When two people break up it is often because one or both of them need space from the relationship. They want to enjoy that space and time away. Remaining in contact with you makes it difficult for them to make the most of the time they are taking away from the relationship. It is time to grow and discover themselves independent of the relationship.
Your ex is avoiding guilt
If you’ve been dumped you feel rejection, sadness and many other nasty emotions. However, the person instigating the breakup also experiences intense emotional distress. They feel guilty for having put another person in pain. Every time they have to see or hear from you they are reminded of the pain they have caused someone they care about. No one likes to cause pain or be reminded of it and so they will often put distance between themselves and their ex.
What you should do
You need to enter into active no contact. You will be respecting your ex’s wish for space. You will also avoid having your ex associate you with negative emotions. If you over-trigger your ex’s feelings of guilt you will be pushing them away from you.
Two very strong emotions occur during a breakup – the rejection and pain of being dumped and the guilt of having caused someone else pain. Rather than having to see the pain they have caused their ex many people will distance themselves after breaking up with someone. Furthermore, most people that leave a relationship are really looking for space. For both of these reasons it’s important that you allow for a period of no contact with your ex. By entering into active no contact you are giving them the space they need and keeping them from associating any negative feelings related to guilt to how they feel when they are around you.
About Clay Andrews
Clay Andrews is a dating and relationship coach who helps women find the right type of man they can create a loving and thriving relationship with. He is the creator of Ex Solution Program- a program that helps couples get back together. To know more about Clay, visit his website below.