- in Commitment
In this video, Love Coach Susan Winter talks about the hot and cold player, and what you can do if your partner pulled away but has now come back to you. Do you just take him back or should you be more wary?
Understand that this is a complicated world and not every man is a player.
Men are confused these days. There is so much conflicting dating advice out there, and men learn how to behave based on experience. For example, if a guy dated someone before you, and he liked her, and told her but she didn’t respond too well to it - chances are that when he meets the next woman he decides to play it a lot cooler.
Now, if YOU were indeed the next woman, chances are, that when you encountered the hot and cold behaviour, you just assumed that he was not into you.
However, it could just have been that he had something else going on there. That he needed to back off a little, and take some time to work on his mindset, and to get rid of some baggage, because men tend to do that, more so than women do. Women often talk about things but men like to take a step back and just work on things, and then when he feels ready he might come back to look for YOU.
You are going to have to use all of your skillset to work out how to handle this.
You have what is called female intuition -so please do use it. Take a step back and ask YOURSELF (not all of your girlfriends), what YOU think is really going on here.
If you feel in your gut that this guy really is just using you, then listen to that feeling and walk away here. However if something deep inside of you tells you that he is not just a hot and cold player and that there must be something else going on here, then by all means, listen to that and give him some time in which to figure things out and then see how he responds to you.
Just know where YOU will draw your line in the sand and never be prepared to stick to that if you believe that a guy is playing with you. You need to trust and listen to your authentic self, the you inside, who knows you better than anybody, because you can be your own best advocate, and you can give yourself the best advice out there, you just need to learn to listen to that and to trust it.
About Susan Winter
Susan Winter (Allowing Magnificence and Older Women/Younger Men), is a bestselling author and relationship expert specializing in higher thinking for an evolving world. She writes, speaks and coaches on cutting-edge partnership models as well as traditional relationship challenges from a platform that fosters self-esteem and personal empowerment.
Susan’s first book, Older Women/Younger Men quickly became an international bestseller as it opened the hearts and minds of readers’ worldwide to the validity of this type of age-gap love. Susan’s second book, Allowing Magnificence completely reframes how we view life’s challenges, empowering the reader to reconnect with the limitless power they already possess. Susan is currently a contributing writer for The Huffington Post and The Good Men Project.
To know more about Susan, visit her website www.susanwinter.net.